A “memorial gift” is always in good taste, especially when the family had requested such a gift in lieu of flowers. It is nice to personalize your gift to the deceased, for example, by making a gift to his or her alma mater, or contributing to medical research for the disease they suffered. Or, the family can suggest a specific charity or other memorial fund, and if you need legal help with this, you can also use a New York wrongful death lawyer to get help with this.
The funeral home can provide you with the appropriate card to inform the family of your gift. You should also provide the family’s name and address to the charity so they can send proper notification. It is also acceptable to mention your gift in a note of condolence, without mentioning the monetary amount. You might say, “Because your father loved his church so much, we have made a gift to the Macedonia Missionary Baptist Church in his honor.”
It is always in very good taste to show your respect to that special family who has lost someone dear to them, by arranging a specialized tribute such as a Memorial Dove Release, or perhaps a special floral arrangement (wreath on a stand such as the “bleeding heart” or a Masonic or Eastern Star Wreath. Each of these gestures represent very unique symbols that dramatize how special a family or the departed loved one is to you. Speak to one of our recommended florists about preparing a special floral tribute for the service. Or speak to one of the directors at Clark Memorial about giving a family a memorial dove release. Any one of these kindnesses will be met with appreciation and will add distinction to the service….
The most welcome gift at this time is food. The bereaved often will have little or no interest or energy for managing household duties. Also, there may be several visitors in the house who need to be fed. In the days immediately following the death, bring substantial dishes that require little preparation other than perhaps reheating. Or, you may want to bring something to help the family with their hosting duties, such as cookies or some other food they may serve to visitors.
It is also kind and thoughtful to remember the children, who are going through a difficult time. A small gift such as a book or a quiet toy like a puzzle would be appropriate.
One of the most compassionate gifts is the gift of your time. Volunteer to perform a specific task to ease the family’s strain … watch the children, care for the pets, vacuum the house, run errands.
Money is not an appropriate gift, although exceptions may be made when the family is left in extreme financial difficulty. In that case, friends may wish to pool contributions to make a gift of assistance.